It’s New Year’s Eve! I’m not much for parties, but I enjoy the reflection of this time of year, looking back and looking ahead. Here are two powerful questions I’ve been sitting with:
What am I saying YES to, in my life, right now?
And in the coming year, What do I want to say YES to?
Sometimes we say yes to things we don’t want. We say yes to make other people happy or to get along. We say yes because it feels easier or because we think we don’t have a choice. We may end up in jobs, relationships, and situations that don’t serve us.
Sometimes we don’t even realize we’re saying yes – we just keep doing what we’ve done.
And sometimes we say YES. We feel it in our gut. We feel deep connection, affirmation. YES. I want this.
Sometimes we’re not sure. We’re not used to to listening for the YES. We may have been taught that the things we want aren’t good, or that we can’t have them. Maybe we think other people can have those things – braver, smarter, more creative people – but not us.
There’s a lot that can get in the way of our YES.
Sometimes we say yes to things – food, drink, shopping, scrolling – that quiet the deeper callings.
Sometimes we’re creating space until we’re ready to hear the YES.
Sometimes it’s a quiet yes, a glimmer that’s been quietly waiting for our attention for years.
Sometimes it’s an instant knowing.
No one can say what kind of YES it is – loud, quiet, gentle, insistent, electrifying, comforting – other than YOU.
It’s your YES.
Maybe one of these resonates with you:
I’m happiest when I’m creating art.
I want to see more of the world.
I’m married to a man but now want to be with a woman.
I feel called to sell my belongings and live a simpler way of life
I’m happiest when I’m with people.
I want a bigger life.
I want more time alone.
I want to be more out in the world, more visible.
We often assume that the YES will find us, will be immediately clear, will yell in our ear and get our attention. But sometimes our YES is more like a cat under the porch, skittish and wary.
One way to make it safe for your YES to come out is to remind yourself that the choice is always yours. Even if you realize you really want something, you can still decide not to pursue it right now. Just knowing is a gift.
To help your YES find you, ask:
Happy new year! I’m grateful to be connected to so many brilliant, soulful searchers through these love notes, the podcast, and my coaching. I wish each of you greater light in 2024 as you find your way to more that makes your spirit say YES. ❤️
One thing that can get in the way of YES is that not believing we can have the things we want. We may think that we believed when we were younger and now it's too late. The truth is, belief is a habit and we can practice believing that we can actually have the things we most want, that we can create a life that lets us feel, YES.
Somewhere along the line, many of us started thinking that belief was for kids. Especially in December, there's a lot of messaging that belief is for children. Maybe it's the power of Christmas movies, but in this week's podcast, I explore the power of belief for grown ups. We believe a number of myths about belief and it's time for us to let them go so we can embrace the power of belief, as the adults we are.
P.S. New Year's Eve, like all transitions, can be difficult -- especially when things are already feeling hard. Relationships may have ended, you may be missing people who are no longer here, or you may be carrying worries from 2023 into 2024. At these times, images of other people celebrating can be especially painful. If this is where you are right now, I hope you will take a few minutes to celebrate yourself and all the ways you continued to show up for yourself over the past year -- through the sadness, pain, and worry. I see you and celebrate you.
P.P.S. In my family, tonight we'll be enjoying the German tradition of melting metal and pouring it into water to make shapes that foretell your future. You can read about it here (we'll use solder, not lead) but know this: I'm a life coach with a degree in semiotics, so I'll decide in advance what I want to see in the melted metal and then I'll use my powers of interpretation to see it. I'm not leaving my mood in the hands of a bunch of melted metal!
⭐ I love being connected to you ⭐
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email: rachel@coachingwithrachel.com
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I'm a life coach, college professor, and former president of the Overthinkers Club. Also, I host the Making Midlife Magic podcast. I love helping middle aged people dream again and create lives they love. Sign up to get inspiring mind shifts sent right to your email box. I don't over-send, and you can unsubscribe any time.
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