A love note from the arcade


When I was a junior in college, I rented a large house with three other women.

In the dining room was a full size arcade machine of the video game Gravitar. Full sized. Can you imagine?

But here’s the thing – None of us ever even tried it.

Months later my boyfriend visited and he wanted to play. So I tried it too and it turned out -- It was so much fun!

It hadn’t even occurred to me to turn the machine on because growing up in the 1980s, girls didn’t play arcade games. I had watched boys play but had never played myself.

Now to be clear -- when I saw that Gravitar machine, I didn’t think, “Girls don’t play video games,” I just didn’t even consider playing.

My sense of what was possible was limited.

I wasn't curious about the game, didn't turn it on for fun -- It almost didn't exist for me until my boyfriend wanted to try it.

It's probably not an arcade game in the dining room for most of us today, but there are so many things that we don't see because we think they're not for us.

Getting a promotion, asking someone on a date, starting a business, traveling to somewhere far away, learning a new language, selling everything to live in a tiny house -- the actual "thing" is different for everyone, but there's something each of us might really enjoy doing that we've never even considered. We don't even see it as a possibility.

This week, let yourself dream a little. If you didn't have to figure it out, what might you really enjoy doing? Often we don't even let ourselves dream because we don't know how to get there. But just letting yourself sink into what you might really enjoy is the first step -- after that, you can figure out how to get there.


Of course, it's not only video games we sometimes have unconscious beliefs about. Sometimes it's thoughts about ourselves, and some of those thoughts drain us of confidence. The good news is, we can create confidence by believing new things about ourselves. Take a listen to this week's episode to hear how to do it.

Episode #41: How to feel confident

Ep #41

We often think of confidence as our prize for accomplishing things. We think we'll feel confident when we lose weight, make more money, win that award. But often we feel a lack of self-confidence despite our weight loss, financial success, and awards.

To increase our feeling of confidence, we have to look inward. Because here's the thing: Confidence is just thoughts we have about ourselves. Things we believe to be true. And we can choose them intentionally. On today's episode:

🌟 How to let go of confidence-busting beliefs

🌟 Why we can hold some positive beliefs about ourselves (I'm smart, I'm a hard worker, etc) and still not be as confident as we want to be

🌟 Two different kinds of confidence and why the difference matters

🌟 How to generate feelings of self-confidence

Love, Rachel

P.S. It means so much to me when people tell me that an episode of the podcast or one of my love notes helped them. That's why I'm on a mission to get this work into the hands of people who will benefit from it. Thanks for sharing with people you know who might need some midlife magic.

P.P.S. All the books say that I should share the same content multiple times. It makes sense, but I don't do that. I share different things on Facebook than I do here or on the podcast. So if you don't want to miss any midlife magic, come hang out with me in all the places. And, of course, if you're curious about coaching, go to coachingwithrachel.com to learn more.

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Rachel Baum

I'm a life coach, college professor, and former president of the Overthinkers Club. Also, I host the Making Midlife Magic podcast. I love helping middle aged people dream again and create lives they love. Sign up to get inspiring mind shifts sent right to your email box. I don't over-send, and you can unsubscribe any time.

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